It's 4:44 PM, and you are sitting at a traffic light on Farmington Avenue in Hartford, just above the intersection of Woodland Street. You are headed downtown, and there are apartment complexes right and left, along with various small businesses, like pizza shops etc.
It's sunny and noisy, and engines roar. Tires squeal and horns blare in ten second increments.
The road is bumpy, rutted, and full of glass. To your right , up in an apartment window, some artistic soul has placed a boombox out his window, blasting angry Gangsta rap for the entire world. You try to make some kind of connection to the lyrics on an artistsic level, just to pass time, even though you hate rap music.
Hartford has a bad reputation for gun violence. Every summer The Gov has to call in the state police it's so bad. There is a huge controversy over this. The music gives you a queasy feeling for a second.
An old man is reeling drunkenly around in the yard, babbling and gesturing at no one in shakespearean fashion.
There's another old guy on a mountain bike trying to cross the fjord. He has three garbage bags full of precious Bud Light cans , to take to market. But these are not Country-Bud light cans. They are just regular ones.
"Go ahead, Man, you got it!!!"
"No, noo, you da man"
"No YOU da man! Come on, man!" (wave)
"No, NO, Noo ( he guffaws)
You both start laughing at this exchange. Even though you both share widely different cycling cultures and etiquette, you have both grasped the absurdity of it all, and for the first time today you start actually laughing. This is cool and very healing.
"Gone are the days when the ox fall down", you think...
Suddenly, a blast of magnolia blossom or cherry tree or whatever fills your nostrils for a fleeting second, but is replaced by the smell of burning rubber mixed with fried chicken.
The helmet mirror is crude and homemade, but works well. You can scan the lineup secretly, without pissing people off. They can't see your eyes in your mirror, as you have shades on.
In Hartford, if you make eye contact with someone, they tend to freak "WTF are you looking at?"
Stealth scoping.
But sometimes a quick head swivel and a nod, if necessary helps to let drivers know you are aware of their presence, and this helps calm their anxiety a lot. They just might give you a second chance, at least for the next 50 yards.
Many times, it's not the driver right behind you that's a threat. It's the ones behind them that can
cause problems. Sometimes it's a good idea to sneak along at walking pace on the sidewalk and survey exactly what's going on in each car before considering jumping into the pseudo-bike lane. Other times, it's better to just wait and let the entire flotilla through, if you know you'll make the light ok. Learning the personalities of each intersection is key. You count the light timers. They do not synchronize lighting here. It's a free for all. They yellow often lasts a half second.
That was the first thing I noticed driving here. I give that a big giant WTF.
Behind you: regular bookish looking guy in VW: probably safe. Behind him, couple arguing. Red flag. Behind them; Honda with loud muffler and tinted windows; red flag...
If the guy in the VW will let you just get through the intersection for 5 seconds, you can pull over and wave the others past. But this means you have to haul ass , a 50 yard sprint at the acceleration rate of three small vehicles going downhill....
The best "blockers" are those big, wide, white buses that carry elderly people around. There are tons of them here, and I make friends with all those drivers. They are like sofa pillows to me.
I always like to let a "blocker" in ahead of me at an intersection. Just like in football. If there is a collision on a cross street, they hit that car/bus/truck as they careen helplessly, like pool balls and marionettes.
The national comissioner of the DOT came to Hartford two weeks ago to start an anti-text messaging campaign. His name is Ray La Hood. He has big balls indeed. He was on Oprah.
I love this guy, but can't help but think back to my sociology courses in Deviant Behavior , Criminal Behavior, and such... "Exactly how are you going to police the police? " Does the program reward them somehow?
They don't even give out speeding tickets in my town. I will shout this across the internet. Feel free to wail as fast as your car can go. I just don't care anymore. Go for it. I dare you.
Traffic on one cross street is horrifically fast. Yesterday you decided that new sidewalk-mellowing tactics are in order. While generally, sidewalk riding can yes, be dangerous, if you do it sparingly and intelligently, it can greatly help. trying to pass a long line of parked cars after making a left at a green light can be suicide, because even if you think you have a clear lane, Hartford motorists love to speed up just to get on your azz. They have never seen a red blinker light before, and want to ask you questions about it. Ok, fine.
It depends on time of day, wind direction, and most importantly phases of the moon. Your own mood is important too, and you have to stay in witness perspective to that.
Getting to your destination after a ride like this makes you feel like you have conquered something just one more time. It's exhilirating.
Getting there in a car is like "Ugh. Okay. I have arrived". I don't miss my Saturn wagon anymore. I used to visit clientele in the thing, and it was a struggle to extricate myself because the car was so low to the ground. I felt like I should "roll out". I felt myself getting fatter as days went by. It was depressing as hell.
The NYC subway system is even worse. It's like being "beamed" there. But unlike the commuter trains, at least you are more likely to stand up. You also get a bonus micro stair climb at the end and a cart snack as you come out of the mole-tunnel, blinking, looking up at nothing but flying pigeons and airline con-trails.
But after a ride you are ready to work when you get there, even if you feel spacy from a combination of endorphins, car exhaust, caffeine, and adrenaline.
It's beautiful, but completely insane.
I may have to leave off here, more thoughts are on the way, but I will end this mindless banter with this historical fact:
When a motorists argues that "the roads belong to cars", it is a known fact that the League of American Wheelmen (Now the league of American Bicyclists) were the ones to lobby for paved roads at the turn of the century.
Bikes and horse carriages were here long before cars.
Hartford had the Pope MFG Co. If you go into the AAA building on Farmington Ave in West Hartford, you will see a cool display of ancient bicycles, and a few cars. Pretty neat.
I would love to have seen what this intersection looked like back then. Someone sent me a cool article on the bicycle written by Mark Twain, who lived right down the road.
peace out, prayers to those in combat
End of part two
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